Willingly

By Barbara Sabol

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If the last sound I hear is a whir of sparrows, an all-at-once ascent 
from the apple tree, air pulsing above the branches, it would be a kind 
of permission. Like the luff of a sheet flung above the bed, again 
and again. That great whoosh of air takes me far out on the water, 
the sail breathing in and out. Coastline fading like memory. 

Light sifts through the blinds tonight the way my mother sifted cake flour 
into a blue porcelain bowl. A dusting of twilight now on the chair, across 
the vanity. In her last days my mother swore she saw wings on the wall 
of her hospice room. First, it was a large bird. Later, an airplane. Look, 
she would say, hoisting herself up on her elbows, can’t you see the wings 
there on the wall? Not a shadow of wings, but actual wings. She was insistent. 
It’s just the light playing tricks, Mom. What else could I say?

But I’ll admit that sometimes I can see the moon fall across the water, 
even though I live inland from the shore. I hear its swash, the riffle of pebbles. 
A commotion of gulls. 

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Barbara Sabol was named 2024 Ohio Poet of the Year for her book, WATERMARK: Poems of the Great Johnstown Flood of 1889 (Alternating Current Press, 2023.) Barbara won the Sheila-Na-Gig poetry contest for her book, IMAGINE A TOWN, in 2019 and went on to become the associate editor of Sheila-Na-Gig online. Other honors include awards from the Ohio Art Council and the Chautauqua Institute. She lives in Akron, Ohio, with her husband and wonder dog.

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