I’m nostalgic for your brand of practice disaster, your dress-up apocalypse pop-up shops and school bus bunkers waiting with flats of tin can dinners for the ball to drop, nostalgic for the simplicity of your question: whether modern life stood on nothing more than strands of old code, a few worn fibers holding up the whole frame. Who knows? you seemed to say, it was a good run, and maybe retracting like an industrial tape measure back to yore without electricity or running water would be good for us, too soft, too comfortable with our start-ups and millennium pop songs. I confess, I liked to say your initials, all caps like a license plate on a Studebaker, hard K that signaled a kitsch of danger. Like Oz behind the curtain on its tinkered pulley, you were all preface, setting up some high school prank where we know it’s a stunt but go along with the staging anyway because we love a good strobe light and punch bowl. Before txtng would consume language, small towns slung into opioid stupor, social media-eroded hours, before orange alerts and orange tyrants, wars we couldn’t end, school lockdown shooting sprees, fire seasons that would parch the west, hurricanes that would steal cities—the list is long, Y2K, do you think you can stay up late enough? Did you see it all coming in your lines of legacy code, how the unraveling would be so slow we might just miss it, doom-scrolling and doordashing, rage-tweeting, masked and shutdown, 20/20, right into a pandemic no one thought to be scared of? I walked through a Midwest neighborhood that last night—did we ever firmly agree when the century officially ended and began?— saw families in lawn chairs in their stockpiled garages with coolers of beer casually rooting for the ruins. If this was the apocalypse they would go down quietly with hot wings by the light of a mini antenna tv. Pitched toward the futurama of flying cars and space pods and freeze-dried meals, you offered up this Frankenstein ruse at the rise of big tech, where we would count down, zone by zone and some invisible binding that held us would let go. I miss that teenage melodrama, the metallic-painted amateur hour you gathered the world around and did nothing but usher us into the continuation of the story, and when you died down and time was revealed to be a construct that wouldn’t kill us, we resumed living toward all the other things that would. That night hospitals gave whistles to their patients just in case the call-bells failed to ring nurses. Y2K, I think we might be blowing them decades too late and it turns out that we can’t hear a cry for help the way we used to.
Jennifer K. Sweeney is the author of four poetry collections: Foxlogic, Fireweed (Backwaters Press/Univ. of Nebraska), Little Spells, James Laughlin Award-winner How to Live on Bread and Music, and Salt Memory. The collaborative chapbook, Dear Question, with L.I. Henley, was published in late 2024 from Glass Lyre Press. The recipient of a Pushcart Prize, she teaches poetry at University of Redlands in California.
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"you gathered the world around and did nothing
but usher us into the continuation of the story,
and when you died down and time was revealed
to be a construct that wouldn’t kill us, we resumed
living toward all the other things that would."
What a fine poem. And true.
Holy shit. So good!!!